Wedding Woes

Wanted a fair, slim, very beautiful , homely, convent-educated, God-fearing, vegetarian etc etc girl for a 27/170 cm engineer boy..Excuse me anything else??A typical newsprint ad of a guy seeking an alliance…
Well to begin with , this is the first phase of horror a girl opting for arranged marriage is subject to..Okay so we go and see Mr.Engineer, an okay-okay 6 figure earning guy settled in US of 'A' in 70% of cases or in some God damn Timbuktu in another 30% cases. Now if its a Hindu family the horoscope matching follows ..Mind you this is the entry criterion..Some people give it so much importance that you feel transported to some 16th century( BTB did they have this that time?)..
Fortunately or unfortunately the horoscopes are matching..What is the next step..The Engineer in US who is so busy , who has no time to go to even loo wants to chat with the girl..The guy's mother ,who thinks being in the US is the ultimate thing to happen , tells the girl's family " My son is so very busy, Can your daughter go at so n so time n chat with my son..??"..Yeah sure why not? The girl who is a software engineer herself seems to be hatching eggs at her office..But does any one care?? The guy is too busy you see..
So the girl goes and chats to the guy in some other part of the globe..Guy's mom still not satisfied..she wants more snaps of the girl to send to her son..The guy did not have a clear view it seems.. Now is the actual fun..She wants the snap in three different poses in three different costumes..That makes it 3 * 3 = 9 ..well you have to be strong in permutations and combinations you know..
Okay so what next?? The snaps are scanned and mailed to Mr.Engineer..Then a realisation suddenly dawns on the guy's head that the girl is .5 " shorter than his requirement..and also one shade darker than what he wanted ..Dhadang!! all hopes crashed for the poor girl to marry an engineer who is busy next to only Dubya..Well now if we assume our guy is Brad Pitt to put such filter criterion, he is, provided you take Brad Pitt and hit him hard with a hammmer so that his face is inclined at a 15 degree angle and paint him little dark ( some 7 shades darker) and hit him on the head as well so that the height reduces by atleast 8", then you have our GUY..Not much of a difference is it?? Not as much as with the girl...
Now the poor girl has to wait for the next TECHIE in the US of "A" to be merciful on her..After all she is born into an Indian family you see..And her woeful story continues till she finds some guy who has more matter in the upper portion if at all she finds one..Else the lesser popular option of "Timbuktu" is always there...